I Want

What I want & What I don’t want

Photo by Ian Stauffer on Unsplash

What do I want?

That’s the question, I’m trying to answer

Is there a difference between a want and a need

Oh It’s hard figuring out the answer

Do I want to be happy? Yes I do

Do I want to be free from my own demons? Yes I do, but I don’t know how to

What is there to do?

Well I want to pray

I want to be closer to god, in my soul and heart

But I don’t know how to

I don’t know how to surrender myself

I want to open myself up to you and everyone I know

But I don’t know how to do just that

I don’t know how to open myself especially to him

And it’s not everyday I face myself to my own doom

And what is my doom?

Well my doom is seeing what I could’ve done when I had the chance

And being to too late to take that chance

That chance to change for the better

Not to lose myself

But to improve myself

What I don’t want

What I don’t want to do is give up when things are hard

I don’t want to stick with the same old, same old routine anymore

I don’t want to be false behind my own words

I don’t want to hate myself anymore

Or be mad at myself anymore

I don’t want to bear everything by myself when I have

People in my life who love me for what I have and who I am

No, really people who love me for who I really am without judgement

I don’t want to disappoint people because I’m afraid of disappointing myself

So have I figured it out?

I’m still figuring everything out but

I do at least know a little about what I want

And what I want is to be free from my own demons

To be free so that way I can be a better boyfriend

I want to be free to be a better fried

To be a better son

To be a better brother

And in reality I have become the best of everything I mentioned

Some more than others, but still doing my best

I just wasn’t free within myself to really love me

And in turn didn’t allow love from others to really be let in

To really allow their help, to be accepted

To be vulnerable

To allow help when I need it

To know that I’m not alone

To know that everything will be ok even if I fall

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A content creator who wants to share their life experience. Writer/ Digital Marketer/Creator. Twitter: @QuanzelleWyatt

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Q The Social Entrepreneur

Q The Social Entrepreneur

A content creator who wants to share their life experience. Writer/ Digital Marketer/Creator. Twitter: @QuanzelleWyatt